My Relationships Have Improved
by KL
A friend told me that Elijah House (EH) was a good place to go for people who wanted to get married or who have kids. EH was supposedly for the older generation with many unresolved issues in their lives.
I often heard of people exclaiming, they wished they had gone for EH earlier so that they could learn not to make wrong choices in life. I believe I must have had disbelief written all over my face whenever I heard such cliché’ testimonies. I could never understand how one seminar could change a person’s life. I even questioned why EH had the audacity to call its seminar ‘Keys to Transformation’. I thought to myself, only Christ could do that work.
So I joined EH primarily because I was curious and perhaps I was quite desperate to turn my life around. But little did I know how gravely mistaken I was about EH. EH is definitely not for just the older generation, but its influence transcends all walks of life, all ages and all maturity levels. It definitely isn’t just for those with kids or those who want to get married! The seminar brought the keys to transformation in my life not just because EH had charismatic speakers, but because EH helped magnify God’s love and helped me appropriate God’s promises. All along God had shown us how to live victoriously, He had shown us Love. Yet I believe the greatest tragedy is that a lot of us do not know how to receive His love.
I had been praying for a breakthrough in my life the past few years. So when EH came along, I knew it was an answered prayer. I had been waiting to hear from God on where he wanted me. But somehow God seemed quiet. But EH has been used by God to speak volumes to me because I had been deaf all along. I have always credited my life as ideal, almost brimming on perfection. After all, I have every thing a person my age would desire. To the world I had it all. And yet, before I knew Christ, I’d have bouts of depression and I couldn’t understand why I could never celebrate success, why I was always lonely despite always having company around, why I suffered constant anxiety attacks and always felt highly critical about myself. In a nutshell, I felt void. Money, relationships and even success couldn’t fill that emptiness. When I became a Christian, the bouts of depression were less severe. When I found Christ, I found real joy and happiness. But before long, I found that I didn’t have that peace. It wasn’t because Christ stopped working in my life. But it was my own self who didn’t know how to receive Him entirely in to my heart. Instead of feeling joy, I felt more depressed as I learnt more about my sinful nature. There was a constant war raging within my soul, which I think the apostle Paul was describing. Sometimes I felt like a fake because I didn’t have that true peace which Christians were supposed to have. How could I encourage a non-believer when as a believer, I wasn’t living that abundant life.
There began the whole cycle of striving to be the good Christian. After a while, it all became a routine and I was feeling apathy. I was earnestly seeking God’s approval thinking if I was only nicer, kinder, gentler, I would please Him. Deep down I knew He would love me regardless of what I did, and yet that head knowledge had never translated to understanding with my heart. Coming to EH helped make that truth real within my heart. I had all these little symptoms of a crackdown occurring in my life, but I just covered the issues and buried them thinking that it was a normal struggle that all went through. I thought, it’s just a season of dryness. It wasn’t that EH had psyched me in to believing something about myself. But it was through EH that I realized more things about myself which in normal cases, I would’ve never bothered to ponder. EH really shocked me in to realizing how little did I really know about myself. The bible said each one should judge themselves with sober judgement. I believe I had not done so.
However, after every good breakthrough, I found myself questioning EH. I wondered how come something so wonderful as EH wasn’t in every church. I questioned about some of the teachings. But to my surprise, it seemed that whatever worries I had regarding the teaching, was always answered even before I would ask a question about it. God says that whoever who lacks wisdom he should ask and it would be given to him. I believe God answered all those doubts that I had. After every class, my mind would start questioning and immediately, within that same day, one of the facilitators would say something. The answers were NOT merely logic answers but always supported by the word of God. The ultimate appeal of EH is that it is grounded by the Word of God. That I believe is the fundamental thing in how this ministry can work miracles in people’s lives including mine. It is also the number one reason as to why I chose to come back for the School Part 2.
I am thankful that a ministry like EH exists. Truly, it is a ministry that ministers to the hearts of people and helps make disciples. This ministry adds the finishing touch by helping aspiring disciples run the race. By speaking truth in to the people’s hearts, it frees them. EH has helped free me from the bondage of striving to be a good Christian but instead really allowing myself to fall with the full confidence that Abba Father will carry me through it all.
Now, I find myself telling everyone, if only I had come to EH earlier I could avoid those mistakes I had made. I now see my loved ones in a different light. My relationship with loved ones has become better. Although I feel more burdened now than ever, but there’s true inner joy. I have been feeling so apathetic about life I am thankful for this feeling. I know that this feeling I have is because I am beginning to truly allow myself to be vulnerable and trusting in God instead of trying to fix myself and leaving God out of the picture. EH has brought my faith to a higher level and I believe, nothing pleases God more than faith. I am processing all the truths that God had revealed via EH and am letting it pulsate in me however uncomfortable, uncertain or fearful I might be of the outcome. Being in the dark too long, coming out in to the light sometimes hurt the eyes. But hallelujah, because God is a gentleman, He never forces me to heal, but uses things like EH to gently draw me towards meaningful convicted truth.
After learning about bitter root judgments and its fruits, it has become clear to me that I own an orchard of bitter fruits. Even if all the roots have not been slain with an axe, I am still thrilled in having this revelation. I know God is working in me as I feel him pruning me.
I am thankful for this ministry as it is like medicine, balm for a wounded soul. The ministry may not be the one causing the change in my life. In fact it is God doing so, but He has chosen to do so via this blessed ministry.
All glory and honour to God for sustaining, creating and providing lost sheep like us with ministries such as EH.